Dear Self,

Three hadith qudsi (narrations of the prophet revealed to him directly by God) to reflect upon in these last days of Ramadan. Use each moment to make a difference. (It is understood in translation that when the narrations say “son of Adam” it is in reference to all children of Adam and Eve- male and female)

O son (and daughter) of Adam, so long as you call upon Me and ask of Me, I shall forgive you for what you have done, and I shall not mind. O son (and daughter) of Adam, were your sins to reach the clouds of the sky and were you then to ask forgiveness of Me, I would forgive you. O son (and daughter) of Adam, were you to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth and were you then to face Me, ascribing no partner to Me, I would bring you forgiveness nearly as great at it.

We learn from the hadith of the prophet Muhammad peace be upon him to pray- “Oh God, You are Most Forgiving, You Love to Forgive, Please forgive my sins”.

O son of Adam, I fell ill and you visited Me not. He will say: O Lord, and how should I visit You when You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: Did you not know that My servant So-and-so had fallen ill and you visited him not? Did you not know that had you visited him you would have found Me with him? O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you fed Me not. He will say: O Lord, and how should I feed You when You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: Did you not know that My servant So-and-so asked you for food and you fed him not? Did you not know that had you fed him you would surely have found that (the reward for doing so) with Me? O son of Adam, I asked you to give Me to drink and you gave Me not to drink. He will say: O Lord, how should I give You to drink whin You are the Lord of the worlds? He will say: My servant So-and-so asked you to give him to drink and you gave him not to drink. Had you given him to drink you would have surely found that with Me.

Think about how we live each day and ignore the plight of those around us. Perhaps it is with those people we ignore or look away from that God is most present.

Spend (in charity), O son (and daughter) of Adam, and I shall spend on you.

What do you spend our money on?

Love,
me

Dear Self,

 

How quickly the time is passing. Our beloved guest, the one we once anticipated so greatly is setting to depart and we are getting ready to greet the days of Eid. It makes me realize that sometimes, we focus so much on the destination that we forget to enjoy the journey.

I see that in you many times, where you set a goal and you just want to get it done. We’ve talked about setting goals and using them to help you attain your potential but don’t forget the secret of a good goal lies in the process of getting there. As someone who knows we worship in everything we do, remember that the journey is as important as getting there. This is our Creator’s way of removing veils that previously kept us from seeing the true reality. In fact, it is in the process that you discover and learn the most about yourself.

Our life’s goal is to attain God’s Pleasure…and hopefully be blessed to stand in His Presence but the journey is what will take us there. So as you set your goals and vision, as you start to build your capacity and try to achieve your purpose, remember that each step along your journey is equally important. In fact, it is the journey that truly determines the destination.

Take time to “smell the roses”, open your heart to the mercy and blessings that surrounds you, live according to the standards He has set and live truly each moment with passion. This is the best kind of worship and more importantly it will take you to the destination you desire.

Love,

Me

Dear Self,

I can see you becoming enthusiastic now. You want to make changes and you know, with Allah’s help, you can do it. It seems like you are filling up with this energy and you just want to get out there and change everything. I am so encouraged by this and I want to support you in every way that I can. Perhaps the best way to do so, is to remind you that the prophet peace be upon him said that the best deed is the one that is most consistent.

So, please make sure that you take your time and think- “what small changes can I make, what small things can I do consistently?” Don’t try to do everything all at once because you will burn yourself out and then it will be easy to fall back into your old habits.

I have seen some community activists who are also active, but either at the detriment of themselves, or their families. While they are out trying to “save and help” everyone else, they lose themselves and their families start (or continue) falling apart. A major part of the problem is that with many organizations, community work is not family-based. So in order to “give back” you are consistently away from your family. This becomes a destructive cycle. So remember to use “balance” to temper your way.

For some, lack of balance is a result of hurt and injustices they have seen and/or experienced. Still, the model we use is the one of moderation and it was best exemplified by Muhammad peace be upon him. No matter, how much people persecuted him, he always remembered the importance of doing what God wanted and not letting his emotions get the better of him.

Balance and Consistency are two essential tools with which you should equip yourself on your quest to meet your Lord. These are the ones that will ensure that the light inside you will continue to burn and that your journey continues to take you towards the One Most High.

I want you to be successful so take time and care; set your goals; write them down and work hard. Insha Allah should you be blessed to meet Ramadan again, she will meet you from a better destination than she did this year! And so, your journey will continue forward.

Love,

Me

Ayesha (ra) related : the Prophet peace be upon him, once came to me when a woman was sitting with me. He asked, “Who is she?” I replied, “She is the same woman known for her (excessive) prayers. Addressing her, he said, “Just listen to me. You are called upon to pray only as much as you can do easily. By Allah, Allah does not tire of you until you yourself get tired. Allah likes those prayers, which a servant can perform easily and regularly. (Agreed Upon)

Dear Self,

As our beautiful guest prepares to leave us, it is important not to let tears of sadness from missing her presence obscure our vision as to why she came in the first place. You, Self, have begun to notice your inner beauty and your strength as a soul; you have more power than you understood. You did what many others think they can’t do. In fact, you’ve begun to let your light disseminate from within, light your path and even illuminate the path of others.

As Ramadan leaves, continue to focus on what you will take from her and what you will continue to do, should you be blessed to greet her on your doorstep again.

Did you begin to do your daily prayers? Did you stop talking about others? Did you improve your eating habits? Began to fulfill your duties at home? Did you begin a new good deed?

Choose some of these things to continue so that Ramadan’s presence would have actually made a REAL difference for you. In this way, instead of being a servant of Ramadan, you continue on as a servant of God. Don’t pick too much so that you are overwhelmed but also don’t choose too little. You know yourself. Start with the MOST important thing that you KNOW in your HEART you should continue. Listen to it, Self, it is trying to guide you to your inner light. Dismiss the voices and noises that will tell you its too difficult. See them as obstacles in a race that you know you can win and start to work on them. Put them down on paper, tell some of your close family members, friends, community leaders, so they can help you stay on track.

I know you may be physically tired now, but inside your heart, there is an oasis of peace refreshing your soul- allow it to fill your being. This is divine tranquility that comes from the One Who brings peace to those who truly seek it.

Remember most of all, that everything that you have, each of your faculties, your abilities, your talents, your skills were blessed to you for the purpose of elevating your soul. So elevate your soul by striving to attain closeness to God and by being a mercy to your society- they are ALL God’s creation. These are your opportunities; the gifts given to you by the Most Loving One to use as His ambassador. Use them to bring benefit to yourself and others.

I know you can do it Self and you know what is even more important?

Allah knows you can do it too!

Love,

Me

A person who calls people towards doing good deeds will get the same reward as those who follow him and do good; and nothing will be diminished from the reward of those who do those deeds. Similarly, those who call people towards vice will have the same punishment as those who follow him without any lessening in the punishment of the perpetrators. (Muslim)

Dear Self,

We are almost nearing the end of this blessed month. You’ve abstained from food, drink and sexual gratification. I think that you’ve learned that you have much more power than you thought, haven’t you? It was filled with many opportunities for you to discover this. From the length of time that you fasted, the prayers, the many deeds that you did, the moments of silence, the tears and the clarity that came through reflection.

What are you learning Self? Are you recognizing your potential? Is it becoming clearer that you are an ambassador of God and that means you have a job to do in this world?  Like Muhammad peace be upon him, you are meant to be a mercy to those around you. You are to meant to go forward in your society and find a way to give back to those who were blessed with different things than you.

You are meant to own the things of this world with your hands and let God fill your heart with His Love and Light. It is time for you to shed all the things that have taken over your life. You’ve reflected on your priorities, so now, get them in order.

You have been given a noble mission, responsibility and privilege- to bring your gifts and talents forward and use it on behalf of the Creator of the universe to bring goodness to others; to help; to share; to do…. It starts wherever you are- in your home, your neighbourhood, village, town, city, province, county, state, country and world.

How can you do this Self?

Get up, let go of your past, shed the judgements of short-sighted people, discipline your ego, leave the hurt behind but keep all the learning from it. Then, look forward.

Your soul needs you to act now; your community needs your skills, so does your country and our world. Even more importantly  though, this is why you were created.

If fasting taught you anything, it should have been the need to be constantly conscious of the Most Merciful and one of the most important ways you “remember” is through your compassionate citizenship and humble, non-judgemental service to others.

Self, how will your family, community, society and country benefit from you? As God’s ambassador, what will you do? Will you wake up now and do what you were meant to do or will you slip back into the monotonous servitude of people and things? Will your vision remain clear about your purpose or will you lose it now that the ritual fast is over?

You have a choice right now…I am urging you to do the right thing..let us work together and live meaningfully, so that when death greets us, we can smile knowing that we will be reunited with our Lord and can look back and know, we did our best while we travelled on the earth.

Love,

me

Dear Self,

How are you? These are the last ten days and nights. The nights are filled with blessings beyond compare. I know you are tired, as these last nights require more from you than the others. But strive; and seek its bounty. Lose your ego and find your Lord in your sacrifices.

Each moment of seeking Him, is closeness to Him; it is freedom of things that enslave you and tie you to this world; it is clarity from the desires that distract you.

So Self, take some time, slow down and let yourself be with God. When you are with Him, you can let yourself be vulnerable because with Him you will find sanctuary, give Him your burdens and take His Trust as your armour, show Him your flaws, seeking Forgiveness and receive His Mercy and Love in return.

You know yourself; the sins you commit- hiddenly, openly, in public and in secret; the sins you’ve tried to convince yourself are ok; the ones that you’ve over-rationalized even though deep within, they haunt you…you are His servant; He is calling you to His Light so leave the darkness and hasten towards it.

He is calling you to all that is good, all that you want even though you may not see it.

Wrapped between His will and your choices are the events that will lead to your final destination. As a traveler, you have the chance to change your trajectory now.

Do it, while you still can.

Love,

Me

Dear Self,

You always seem to be thinking of how you can earn more so you can get more things? You think sometimes that you have to engage in activities that are prohibited because you have no choice- otherwise how will you survive? When money does not come to you as quickly as you want, you pre-occupy your time trying to find ways to make more and more. Worries begin to consume you and slowly, it devours your soul. To me, it almost seems that, at times, you forget Who is your Provider.

As you pre-occupy yourself with such thoughts, without realizing it, you gradually erode your connection with God. Instead of trying to repair it, you spend more time convincing yourself why it is you need to engage in haram activities; you take time away from your prayer and continue to give up your beliefs in order to “earn”. 

Have you ever stopped to think about what it is you are actually earning? While you may see an “improvement” in things financially, you are doing so by sacrificing your relationship with God. 

Why couldn’t you trust Allah?

Wasn’t it Allah who created you? Who has looked after you your entire life? He has put a test before you for you to see what you would do. So, what did you do?  What do you continue to do? Did you give up on your relationship with the One Who never abandoned you?

This is not an issue about needing provision, this is an issue of trust- your lack of trust in God!

Allah is Ar-Razaq- the Provider.

I want you to remember that your provision is already written for you and you are required to do your best and work for it. Then TRUST that He will provide for you without your need to compromise yourself, your beliefs or your values.

Your Lord never stopped providing for you nor does He want you to suffer. You have to realize that the guidelines He put forth are to help to elevate your soul and to liberate you from slavery to people or desires. So do not dispose of them or lose hope. Do not put your trust in other people or in things.

Instead put your best effort forward and work on your trust.

Once a lover trusts their beloved, their relationship will blossom and become stronger. At the first sign of trouble do not give up or compromise the things you hold dear. Is that how you deal with all the relationships in your life?

He was always there, He always has been, He always will be. He Loves you and will provide for you. Trust me.

More importantly though- trust Him.

Love,

me

Synopsis: Trust in the One Who has never abandoned you that He can provide for you. Follow the guidelines He has set, do your best and then TRUST that His provision will come.

Dear Self,

Have you reflected on all that you have today? You have so much but what do you have to “show” for it?

When I think back to the time of the prophets- Muhammad, Jesus and many others, it seems that they did not have a lot of “things”.

Today, you sit at home with your iphones, ipads, blackberrys, computers, your many comforts- hot water, heat, lots of food (so much that you choose to throw away food), televisions and so much more. Have these things made your life any better?

When you look at the humble beginnings and lives of many of the prophets, you see that they did not have much; still their impact transformed the world (and they didn’t have the internet then!). Yet, we spend so much time going after all these things, supposedly to help us be able to be better people, to do more.

When I think about it though, I feel that you don’t own these things; instead they own you! They pre-occupy your time, your every waking moment. To add to that, you always seem to “need” one more thing and so you have to spend  more time and money to get more. So too it is with your degrees on your wall, your big home and fancy cars. They have taken hold of your heart. You’ve forgotten the point of your life- to worship God by becoming a better individual and to serve others.  

Am I saying that it’s wrong to have these things? No I am not.

What I am saying is that the things you now live your life for are supposed to be “tools” to help you live your life in a way that is meaningful before God. We have lost sight of this and now measure our success in life by the amount of “tools” we have collected. Yet those tools have in no way helped us to achieve our highest potential or to live with purpose. All we can say is I was busy in my life collecting stuff to impress people. Remember that you want to worship God through your service to others. You want to use those “tools” as an instrument of goodness and light, not to spend your life collecting them.

In short, own the things of this world with your hands not your heart but then spend your time using those things to do good and remember that is why God put you on this earth!

Love,

me

Synopsis:  It is important to own this dunya with your hands not your heart.  Don’t get distracted into thinking collecting things of this dunya is your purpose. Your true purpose entails using what you have to the best of your ability to be a mercy and in the service of those around you.

Dear Self,

I have been thinking more and more about humility. The more I look at civilizations in the past, I realize how much arrogance led to their destruction. I look at us today and wonder if we are heading down a similar path? The more that we have lost sight of our relationship with God and used it to guide our “progress”, the greater the scale of destruction seems to be.

We’ve lost sight of the earth being a “sacred space”, a beautiful place for worship, a mosque, in which there are signs of His Presence, reminders of our mortality and quite importantly- of our inter-connectedness. The more we’ve advanced  the doctrine of “ME”, we’ve lost the responsibility of “WE”.

Do you live in this world on your own Self?

We share this world and we’ve lost sight of the importance of remembering the responsibilities that come along with communal living. When we are asked to give up something, or to change our habits, the words- “that’s such an inconvenience” or “that’s not for me” glides off our tongues and hearts forgetting…choosing ignorance…so we can “live in the moment”.

We’ve entered Ramadan with thousands dying in fires and millions affected by floods, the largest island of ice in 50 years, just broke off a glacier near Greenland, millions of barrels of oil spilt in the ocean off the coasts of the United States and China. Fresh water on the earth is almost been used up. Our politicians who are only advancing this “live in the moment” dogma don’t care what will happen in the future and many of them have enough money to protect their own families..

WAKE UP Self!

This is not what the prophet peace be upon him left as his legacy- a beautiful soul who protected even the ants. Don’t you remember he removed a campfire so it would not destroy an ant-hill? He, peace be upon him, also said that if you were planting a tree and the day of Judgement was to advance upon you, FINISH planting the tree!

What have you done to try and protect our “sacred earth” Self?

An old Native American saying, puts it wisely, “We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children”…perhaps this is something to think about the next time you feel it’s inconvenient to make a sacrifice to benefit our environment, to change your habits or to think about those whom your actions affect.

What have you left for our children Self?

Think…

and then do something about it.

Love,

Me

Getting ready for the last 10 days? Jeewan Chanicka

 

The last ten days of Ramadan are almost upon us. We know more specifically the last 10 nights are filled with numerous blessings if we were to be in prayer on Laylatul Qadr (the Night of Power). It is the night on which our destinies are written, when thousands of angels descend and forgiveness and mercy abound.  It is a night better than a thousand months. In fact the prophet peace be upon, “during the last ten days of the month of Ramadan used to keep awake the whole night and would call upon the members of his family to do the same, greatly intensifying for prayer”.  Here are some tips to try and maximize your last ten nights and I pray that you and your families are blessed to find Laylatul Qadr and Allah accepts all your good deeds and prayers during this beautiful month.

 

• Make the intention from now that you will search for this blessed night and make dua from now that Allah blesses you to find it.
• Any shopping for Eid or big groceries, try to get them done in these remaining middle days. Go with a singular purpose- to get your shopping done! Get your list ready and the dua, “Bismillahi Allahumma inni as’aluka khayra hadhihis-suqi wa khayra ma fiha wa a’udhubika min sharri ma fiha. Allahumma inni a’udhubika an usiba fiha yaminan fajiratan awsafqatan khasrah.”

In the name of Allah. O Allah, I ask You for the benefits of this market and for the benefits in it. I seek Your protection from the evils of this market and from the evils in it. O Allah, I seek Your protection from a false oath in this market and from a transaction of loss.

 

Remember why you are going and stay focused on that- now is not the time for window-shopping.

 

• Set up a cleaning schedule to make sure that the heavy cleaning gets completed before the last ten days. The last thing you want to
 

 

do is spend so much time cleaning during the day and be

too exhausted to stay up at night to pray.

• Have a family meeting, find a way to make sure everyone is sharing the chores and work that needs to be done, so no one person is exhausted from doing house-work.
• Make a plan to pray together. Ideally, if you have a space somewhere, where everyone can gather together and pray that is best.
• If your family can go to the mosque for taraweeh prayer and early in the morning to tahajjud prayer, then go together. If not, set a plan in place so you can help each other to maximize the benefit of the night.
• Remember when you help others to gain the blessings of that night, you too get blessings from their prayers.
• Choose specific verses of Qur’an to read together or with each other. Choose some surahs or ayahs to listen to.
• Have Eid clothes and shoes etc. all ironed and hung so this does not distract you.
• If you can nap during the days, then do so, in order to be able to wake more during the night.
• What do you want to make dua for- have you thought about it? Maybe you need to write it down?
• Ask your family and friends to make dua for you on those nights.
• You know your body best, figure out what works for you- some people just stay up- coffee helps; or other things…but figure out- do you need to stay up for a bit, then nap, wake up and start back? Is it hard for you to wake up after you go to sleep and so you need to do as much as you can all in one shot?
• If you need to take a nap during the night- rotate naps with some family members/friends so that you have someone to help make sure you get up. If you live alone, get someone to call you or set your alarm and put it somewhere that is not right next to your bed. Hopefully this will ensure you have to get OUT of your bed to turn it off.
• Of course many have school/work the next days so we may not all be able to stay up the entire night- remember Allah knows what you are capable of and will not expect more than your best. Do your best and remember that Allah’s blessings and mercy is beyond measure.
• Itikaaf- the last ten days is a great time for itikaaf (seclusion from all worldly affairs at the mosque). If you are able to do this, that’s great Alhamdulillah. However, not many people are able to due to work/school commitments. If not, remember the principle I mentioned before- don’t sacrifice doing some, if you can’t do all- Allah knows what you are capable of doing. So do what you can and as much as you can. If you can only go for a couple days, then do so. If you can only do one day- do so; even if it’s only for a couple hours-do it insha Allah. Just remember to make your intention. Oh and just so we’re clear- you got to turn off your technology. Itikaaf is time for you and God and guess what you already have a direct line to Him, so you won’t need your phones.
• Here’s something many sisters don’t know. Sisters can make itikaaf as well. The wives of the prophet pbuh used to do so. HOWEVER before you go banging down the doors of some of your local mosques and demanding that they let you stay OR rioting in your families because br. Jeewan said so- take it slowly and breathe. Some mosques will have sisters sections set up for prayer etc.  so ask ahead of time. If they say no, there are not able to facilitate it, then leave it this year- Allah knows your heart and intentions. Work with some other women over the course of the coming year to help the mosque have things in place to facilitate it next Ramadan- Remember, Allah will bless you by your intention.
• Iftar- try and prepare simple meals for iftar so you are not exhausted at night and have difficulty to pray. If you are inviting people over, let them know ahead of time that since it’s the last ten days that it will be a simple iftar OR as many of the younger folks are doing these days- POTLUCK. Everyone makes something and bring it over. Let your guests know that after iftar you will go to the mosque together. Think of the rewards you will get for this J
• Sadaqa- by now, you should have already paid your sadaqatul fitr. In Toronto, it is $10 per person in each household. Also, if you can, try to give extra sadaqa as well. There are many local and international worthy causes, such as local mosques, educational institutions; Muslimserv- in Toronto gives food to foodbanks and of course donating to our brothers and sisters around the world. One particular critical case- Pakistan.
 

Hopefully there are a couple of tips in here to help you and your family gain the most blessings from Laylatul Qadr.
 

Please remember the author of this article and his family in your duas during those blessed nights.

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