Jeewan Online

Dear Self,

Everywhere we turn, I hear the words, “me”, “I”, “live YOUR life the way YOU want, that’s all that matters!”, “Its about ME and what I want”. But, is it all that matters? It is important that we search for our purpose and then live to be the best we can, to contribute ourselves, fully and totally; to find happiness and contentment in our lives. It is only when we nurture our spirits and fulfill our purpose for living can we have a fulfilling relationship with our Creator and be free of living our lives in the eyes of others.

But, is living life the way WE want really all that matters? Where is the line of balance that must temper our actions? Our acknowledgment that we did not come into the world by ourselves, we did not raise ourselves, and more importantly- that our actions impact others too. Many others have sacrificed, helped, facilitated our journey to where we are standing right now.

Today, this sense of entitlement seems to have taken over so many peoples’ lives that they have become rude and arrogant to their family members, to neighbours, in their workplaces and in the community. Today in our society, many people show up in, do the bare minimum required and expect that they should get the best rewards for it. There is no sense of working for what we want; of going above and beyond what is expected and trying our best at what we do.

As a Muslim, your signature is- Ihsan or excellence. You do your best, because you know that God is watching you. You do your best because this IS YOUR WORSHIP. Whatever you do, you should be trying to excel- not for praise, not for acknowledgment by others, but because it is your divine duty. You have been blessed with certain talents- those are gifts, you did not create them on your own. So while it may be a privilege, it is your responsibility to do your best.

The prophet peace be upon him was known as “uswatun hasana” the perfect example. He strived to be the best that he could with what he had by Allah’s mercy. So too should you.

So Self, don’t be ungrateful or selfish; don’t expect that your parents are just supposed to give you what you want; or that your husband or wife should just do certain things for you. To live a life filled with love and compassion necessitates sacrifice and compromise and there is also happiness to be found  when the people around you are happy, even if you have to do without.

Be careful that you are not developing a culture of entitlement- people who do little- the bare minimum- and expect a lot. That is an attitude of ingratitude and it will not get you far in the eyes of people or in the eyes of God.

Love,

Me.

Dear Self,

I always wonder why you want everyone to be like you sometimes, do what you do; believe what you believe.

You see Self, the only way to be the best you, is to acknowledge the gifts and talents of others. If all we think about is us and what we want, we will never be able to see the beauty that exists in others around us. We are so quick to invent boxes, to label people. In our community- Sufi, Salafi, Tablighi, Wahabi…the list is long and extensive. Is it really necessary? Can we not agree that the path to God is wide and that each soul’s journey along it is different but we are walking towards the same goal? Can we not build a foundation upon the beauty of our diverse perspectives?

It is disheartening that there are so many people with so much time to sit and talk about other Muslims, expose their flaws and try to show how they are “bad Muslims”. I often wonder why we cannot unite on the principle- “Work together on what we agree and excuse each other on what we disagree”? Shouldn’t we be humble because we know we are not perfect and despite others’ flaws and mistakes, they may actually be better than us in some ways? Or is it the fear that others may be excelling in some areas or be better than us in some ways, the reason for your judgements?

 I am not talking about the beauty in Muslims alone; I am talking about the beauty in ALL of God’s creation. After all, it is God WHO ordained diversity, painted us in different colours, graced us the ability to speak in different tongues. Who are we as people to sit as judge and jury on His Divine Decree. Is there a need to judge people who don’t believe what you do? Who understand life differently? Shouldn’t we be humble enough to see the good in those around us and leave judgement to God alone? If you know already, that in the end, we go back to Him, why do you need to put in your “two-cents”?

The last time I checked, God did not need our assistance nor did He need a partnership. You can really keep your judgement to yourself.

Walking on the earth with humility does not mean denying your gifts and talents because you should. However, it also means to open your heart to include the talents and gifts of others. This paves a path for Love, Respect and Brotherhood instead of sowing seeds of Hatred, Intolerance and Arrogance.

So Self, today, I remind you to let go of the insecurities that cause you to see less in people. Instead, see your own beauty and actively search for the beauty in others. In so doing, you will allow light into your soul and encourage beauty to adorn your path.

Beauty and Light attracts more Beauty and more Light.

Love,

Me

Dear Self,

I listened to you yesterday as you sat and talked to others at an iftar. Your conversations were good, reminding each other of God and the importance to be involved in doing good, for all people. Yet, there were moments in between where people took liberties to mention other people.

True or not, you should not talk about others behind their backs. It is only when people feel badly about themselves that they seek the flaws in others and use their time speaking about others so that they may make themselves feel better.

Just remember with each word, your good deeds drop from your scales like the leaves on a dying tree. A soul that is at peace with itself will not seek out the flaws of others, or make it public. Instead, they will be able to see goodness when it is not apparent to others.

On the day of Judgement, you will be held accountable for what you said and what you listened to. If you must say something, let it be positive otherwise, be quiet and remember that the appreciation and thanks is for God.

So Self, to put it simply this Ramadan, stay away from talking about others!

Love,

Me

Dear Self,

We know so much, but sometimes I think we have only really learnt a little. It’s as if we learn things to satisfy our egos, that we are studying Islam and “know” more than we did before.

Yet, Self, what do we do with what we know? What have you done with what you learnt?

If you want to attain a higher level of being, you need to be more conscious of the One who put you on this earth and the only way to do so is to learn. We have heard time and time again that knowledge is the right of a Muslim. That s/he should seek it wherever it takes them, even as far as China, but why is that? Why should we seek knowledge?

Today, we spend so much time trying to memorize the Qur’an- is that wrong? I don’t think so…but I often wonder if people spend time reflecting on the fact that the sahabahs didn’t spend time “memorizing” the Qur’an. In fact, their understanding of “memorization” was to commit some verses to memory and then act on them. When they became good at doing so, THEN they would memorize some more.

Additionally, in the Qur’an, the words, “ilm” and “amal” are always coupled- knowledge and action. It is because knowledge is supposed to lead to action.

So Self, the questions you really have to ask are- what do you know? How have you used each day to improve what you know? and what have you done with what you know?

You see, if you are to truly attain your potential, it can only be done from a place of humility and literacy as opposed to arrogance and ignorance.

During this month, please, try to find one thing each day that you can learn and use it to improve yourself and to be of benefit to those around you.

Love,

Me

Dear Self,

We are half way through this spiritual journey and I wonder if you are taking advantage of the blessings that are in front of you? Time continues to elude us, after it is gone, we cannot find it again, so keep working hard.

As you continue to work hard, difficulties will arise, I want you to remember to find your strength within. Your purpose is to change yourself, to tame your ego and to realize your true potential. Only in so doing, will you truly find your purpose before your Creator. It is He, who created you to bring light and mercy to those you touch. Do not allow your mistakes, the errors of the past and the misguided words of people to take you away from your path to enlightened ascension. It is only in finding your purpose in your relationship with Him will you find true inner peace.

While all of creation turned down the weight of the responsibility of being Allah’s ambassador, you were amongst those who stood up to fill that role.

So, Self, when you face difficulties, anchor yourself down and find your inner strength. Turn to Allah and make dua (supplication) and do not let doubt creep into your being. Instead be patient and know that His Perfect Plan unfolds in the way that it must and with patience, you too shall discover its beauty and perfection.

We don’t always recognize the goodness that can come from hardship, but your Lord, is Most Compassionate and ever Present in your life. He will not abandon you, so do not abandon Him by losing hope or giving up. 

Today, Self, remember that when things get difficult, even if you are at the lowest you’ve ever been, Allah will never let you go. Be Patient and be constant in your dua- that my friend is a sign of strength not a sign of weakness.

Love,

me

The Prophet pbuh said, “ Allah likes a strong believer more than the weak one. Out of all good things, ask for that which may be the most beneficial to you. Keep imploring Allah for help and do not give up. Should you come across some mishap, do not say: Had I only done this and that things would have turned out so and so; instead say, only Allah so determines and did as He willed; because this phrase, “ Had I….” only opens the gates of evil conduct. - Muslim

Dear Self, 

As you continue to understand living with purpose and achieving your higher potential, have you  stopped to really think about what you “want” for yourself? So we are born to worship God, but apart  from the rituals, which all Muslims are obligated to do, what in your worship is special? What sets  you apart from everyone else? How do you use your unique talents and capabilities to give back?  After all, you are as unique to this world as a snowflake from the heavens and a fingerprint etched in the landscape of time.

When you think about your life and think about your goals and final destination- what do you want to achieve with what you’ve been blessed? The other important question to answer is: do your actions match those desires you have for yourself?

Sometimes we like to think that our actions do; like a parent who says they are working for  the good of their family and although they are financially comfortable, they spend more of their time at work and  less with their children, losing all the time with the ones they claim to be working for OR like those who say they are busy doing community work and they are out doing everything for everyone else while their family or closest friends or neighbours are suffering.

In short, Self, I am asking you to think through these things to see if you are living  a contradiction and to remember that you have to make sure your actions are aligned with your goals and even more importantly, that your goals will earn you God’s Pleasure. 

Remember if you don’t start by choosing what you want to achieve, praying for it, working for it, you will never achieve it. God waits and listens for the prayer of those who seek His help, just so He can answer it.

But we have to work for what we want. Along the way, we have to continue to evaluate to see what progress we are making and if there is anything we need to change in order to be the best.

Self, you’ve done a good job over the past few years but don’t become complacent.

Keep working; a diamond only shines after much work and pressure.

Keep working to be the best YOU that you can be.

Love,

Me

Remember: One who desires chastity, Allah makes him chaste; One who wants contentment, Allah makes him contented; and the person who aspires for steadfastness, Allah bestows steadfastness upon him. No one has been awarded a blessing better than patience and  submission. (Bukhari and Muslim)

Dear Self,

I read this hadith, “ Cleanliness is equal to half of faith and to say ‘Alhamdulillah’ (all Praise is due to God) helps the scale of actions to become heavy; the utterance of ‘Subhan Allah’ (Glory be to God) and Alhamdulillah are good enough to fill the space between the heavens and the earth with blessings. The Salat (prayer) is light; Giving Charity is proof of one’s faith; and to be patient is as good as light and the Qur’an is a plea in your favour or against you (depending on what you do with what you know). Everyone begins their morning ready to bargain for his soul and either frees it or loses it!”

Today Self, let your tongue be moist with the remembrance of God. Fill the time while you are driving, standing in line, waiting for someone with the words that will bring light and remove the obscenities and idle talk that you often want to fill it with. It’s funny how easy it is to waste our time, use bad language, talk about others and not want to try and replace something we know is negative with something that can bring us so much benefit.

What you say is a reflection of what is within and what is in you is what you have put in. Today, start the process of filling your being with goodness and His remembrance.

When you fill your soul with light, you will illuminate the path you walk upon and it will also fill the lives of those you touch with it’s goodness.

Love,

Me

Dear Self,

I have seen you spending much time reflecting, tears welling up in your eyes as you remember the many mistakes of your past. Sometimes, our bad deeds, our mistakes can be overwhelming, like a tidal wave submerging us each time we try to raise our heads up. The feeling of difficulty to breathe can be crushing to both our hearts and spirit.

What becomes worse are those “mistakes” that have occurred in or become public. Sometimes the damage that comes from their words and judgement can be debilitating and paralyzing. It seems that some people try to find their perfection in the imperfection of others. Instead of hating the sin and loving the sinner, their words and actions are hateful- all in some bizarre way, in the name of God.

It’s so ironic I think, that people can share selfishness, spite, hate, anger, vengefulness and claim it to be from the One Whose Mercy is greater than His desire to Punish. They find comfort in their self-righteousness as their words, stares and actions continue to fill you with pain. Like someone sticking a knife into an open wound.

Do not be like those people Self, if you want God to forgive you for the many sins that tears fill your eyes about today, then make sure you are working at forgiving those who have hurt you.

Try harder when the personal pain is greater to forgive because we both know, you’ve made some pretty huge mistakes too. You can’t want God to forgive you for those, while you don’t want to forgive others, can you? More importantly, Self, make sure and do not humiliate others, as some have done to you? I know there sometimes are those waiting simply to see you make a mistake so they can throw it in your face but what if God were to humiliate you for your mistakes? As difficult as it is, we have to treat others the way we want to be treated, even if sometimes they are the wrong ones.

Today Self, I want you to remember that even your mistakes have shaped you and brought you to where you are. That you are remorseful is important but do not let the shortsightedness of people tamper with your compassion or your desire to become better in the eyes of God. Too many others become overwhelmed and shut themselves off. People’s negativity and personal guilt turns off their desire to become better. That is exactly what Shaitan wants, to stop you from doing good. Even worse, when you forget how it feels when people treat you that way and you do the same; you may be responsible for turning people away from God. Do you want to bear that responsibility? Remember just like you are a person who made mistakes, they are people who also make mistakes. Forgiveness and Compassion are the lights that engulf the darkness that dwells within our souls.

Self, seek your perfection, in the One who is Most Perfect, not in the imperfection of others. Seek His forgiveness and then commit yourself to start the process of rebuilding, one step at a time. Approach people with love and leave it all in His capable hands. Don’t decide that you will not or cannot attain a certain level of closeness to God because of your mistakes. Simply try. Keep close to those who will support you and remember to continue to challenge yourself to be the best you possible. Not the best you that people will love; the best you that God will love. It is through this, that you will win the love and respect of the people who matter.

After all being the best you, is the quest of life and it is only in your self-discovery that you will truly be happy and fulfilled. Anything else is temporary and will never fill the void that exists in your heart today.

Love,

Me
“ God will continue to hold out His Hand at night so that he who has sinned during the day might repent and to hold out His Hand during the day so that the one who has sinned at night might repent and God will continue to do so till the sun rises from the West”. Muslim

Dear Self,

Every breathing moment, is a chance to do good; to serve creation; to make the world a better place. When God talked about being leaders in this world, He means, leadership through service to humanity and really all of creation- animals and the environment.

Sometimes, we think that doing “good” means that we have to “join a cause or an organization” and while those things are important, each breath of life is a chance to do good. It begins by being good to ourselves, being good to the people with us- our family, our friends and then translating that into doing for others.

Self, start with kindness to yourself- making good choices in your diet and sleep patterns; helping at home- not taking your family members for granted but instead seeking ways to help, just like you try to impress strangers sometimes; impress your family first. Then find ways to use your unique talents and potential to help those around you. DO NOT BE LAZY.

Somehow we’ve lost site of our true purpose for living and so when we finish our schooling, our lives become dominated by “work- I’m so busy” and getting a house/car and if we are married, “I am so busy with family”. Some of this is normal but in reality if/when we go back to our purpose- if our purpose is worship and we worship through our actions- then our jobs, our marriages, our relationships should be to worship God. EVERYTHING Self, should be designed towards the goal of serving your Creator. I want you to try working with that goal-of attaining His Pleasure- by developing yourself AND then giving back. You didn’t get anything you have by yourself or only by your efforts. If God, did not bless you to have them, you would be nowhere.

Remember, for every good thing that you do, there is reward in that, even if no one says Thank You- God has seen it, and for that you will be rewarded. Just as if you were inclined to do something evil and you kept away from it, you would be rewarded for it too.

Motivate yourself to live up to your true potential Self and encourage the people who are around you, not to lose sight of that. It’s easy to fall into the trap to be like everyone else. But, you are not like everyone else. You are YOU and God knows your truest, highest potential. He knows what is in your heart. The only way to re-discover your inner light is by starting to DO and by GIVING BACK to those who were not blessed with what you have. S

tart today, you will not be disappointed!

Love,

Me

One who makes up his mind to do a good deed, is rewarded by God for one full measure of it and if he then proceeds to carry it out Allah rewards him from ten to seven hundred times and even many times more. He who is inclined towards an evil deed but does not carry it out, is rewarded by Allah for one full measure of good deed. Should he carry it out, he is debited by only one evil deed.

Dear Self,

This month we’ve talked about priorities a couple times. It seems though as I look around, I see so many people turning a month that is designed to develop our Closeness with our Creator, into a “party scene”.

Elaborate iftars, with a multitude of dishes, hours and hours in preparation, spending time getting dressed, idle talk about things that have little benefit to our souls are often the important aspect of these gatherings.

Worse, people sit and stuff themselves, such that they either do not leave to pray tarawih prayer, to even pray fard. There is no dhikr or remembrance, no reminders in the conversations and the heavy meals and idle talk makes prayer difficult. What in all of this type of behaviour will help you to become closer to your Creator, Self?

We say that we’ve progressed, we’ve amassed money, property and have status in the eyes of people but have you forgotten where all this came from? Are you becoming so forgetful or arrogant that you can’t re-design your time, activities and efforts in a way to show gratitude for all that you’ve been blessed with? Or is your time for God, only when you are in need?

Do not be ungrateful Self!

Today, I have one reminder, one which I hope will stay with you through Ramadan and after. The Prophet peace be upon him said, “Prayer in congregation (mosque) is more than 25 times greater in merit than prayer at home or in the shop etc.” Therefore, when a person makes their ablutions carefully and proceeds to the mosque with the sole purpose of joining in the prayer, their status rises in grade at every step, and one of their sins in wiped out. From the moment, they enter the mosque, they are accounted as a participant in the prayer while waiting for the prayer to begin and so long as they cause no inconvenience to anyone and is in a state of purity, the angels continue to pray for their salvation and they say, “O God, have mercy on them; God, forgive them; God, be compassionate to them”.

Would it not be wonderful to have the angels themselves pray for you and your friends?

Self, please remember, the days in this month are sacred and blessed. Do not waste them. Encourage your friends and family with kindness to not waste each valuable moment. We do not know if we will live to see tomorrow, so let us live purposefully today! Remember that at the next iftar you go to. Who knows which step towards the mosque will be the step that tips our scales to the right and in the favour of our Lord?

Love,

Me